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Belvalew Registered user Username: Belvalew
Post Number: 820 Registered: 7-2004
| Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 11:55 am: | |
Like most of you I enjoy getting emails from my friends, but also like most of you, those emails are often forwards. I enjoy them, too, and some are informative, delightful, and thought provoking. All of that being said, I received the following this morning, as a forward, and it speaks to the haox aspects of several of the forwards we get every day, in particular those calls for prayer for young victims of cancer and other terrible diseases. Once something is set in motion on the internet it can continue to rotate forever, whether the information therein still applies or not. Take, for instance, the student project looking for the occurance of names... Anyway, I hope you enjoy this "forward" as much as I did, and I truly want to wish all of you, my FAF Family and Friends, a truly blessed Christmas. Christmas Cheer To All.......... As the holidays approach, my heartfelt appreciation goes out to all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me "forwards" over the past 12 months. Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy. Extra thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat crap in the glue on envelopes 'cause I now have to go get a wet towel every time I need to seal an envelope. Also, I scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason. Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains. I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans. I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer. I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS. I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day. I no longer go to shopping malls because someone might drug me with a perfume sample and rob me. I no longer receive packages from nor send packages by UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise. I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan. I no longer eat KFC because their "chickens" are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers. I no longer have any sneakers - but that will change once I receive my free replacement pair from Nike. I no longer have to buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe. I no longer worry about my soul because at last count I have 363,214 angels looking out for me. Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes. I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl who is about to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time). I no longer have any money at all - but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special email program. Yes, I want to thank you so much for looking out for me that I will now return the favor! If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 7 minutes, a large pigeon with a wicked case of diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 PM (CDT) this afternoon. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next-door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician. Happy Holidays in advance, :-)
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Windmotion Registered user Username: Windmotion
Post Number: 242 Registered: 6-2001
| Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 12:18 pm: | |
Yeah, that was pretty funny. ROTFLMAOPMP Hannah |
Belvalew Registered user Username: Belvalew
Post Number: 822 Registered: 7-2004
| Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 12:40 pm: | |
Interpretation please. I'm not that good at figuring out the short forms. I got the first four words, "rolling on the floor..." but the rest escapes me. |
Windmotion Registered user Username: Windmotion
Post Number: 243 Registered: 6-2001
| Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 3:19 pm: | |
Ummm, some of the words are not the most appropriate, which is why it is an abbreviation. Let's say the rest of it is "Laughing My ... Off Peeing My Pants." Explanatorily, Hannah |
Belvalew Registered user Username: Belvalew
Post Number: 823 Registered: 7-2004
| Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 3:51 pm: | |
Thanks for responding, and forgive me for putting you on the spot. I'll have to remember that for future reference. |
Belvalew Registered user Username: Belvalew
Post Number: 824 Registered: 7-2004
| Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 3:57 pm: | |
Thanks for responding, and forgive me for putting you on the spot. I'll have to remember that for future reference. |
Flyinglady Registered user Username: Flyinglady
Post Number: 2124 Registered: 3-2004
| Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 5:00 pm: | |
Belva, You had more courage than me!!! Diana |
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