| Author | Message | ||
| R_e_h2001 Registered user Username: R_e_h2001 Post Number: 1 Registered: 6-2019 |
I’m very interested in a community of former Adventists who, perhaps, can understand where I’m coming from. I was born into an active SDA family that attended church in Halifax Nova Scotia. My mother was active through her whole life in the music programs and served on many occasions and in many capacities as choir director, pianist, organist or music director etc. She dedicated her whole life to the church. My brother until recently, has been a music director at one of the SDA academies on the west coast of the USA. Having been raised in the church, I was baptised at 13, attended both public as well as Adventist schools, graduated from Kingsway College and then Branson Hospital…and by the time I was 23, I’d walked away from the church and been disfellowshipped. When I was notified that a meeting was scheduled to consider removing my name from the church books because of my backsliding ways, I was offered the opportunity to come and represent myself in the proceedings. I did not attend and didn’t think it would bother me as I wasn’t attending church anyway. When I was notified (by registered letter) of being disfellowshipped, I was surprised at how much it did bother me – it hurt. I was surprised at just how much is wrapped up in being part of the SDA culture and mini-society. For years after, I’d refer to myself (in a joking manner) as a spiritual amputee and mention I must have been exceptionally bad to get kicked out of church. For probably 30 or so years, I wanted nothing to do with anything religious. A few years ago, I became more interested in my spiritual side and specifically wanted to see what Jesus really taught and was thus drawn back to the path I’m now on. I am a Christian though I have not joined any denomination. I worship regularly with a small Pentecostal church and have become good friends with the pastor. He is quite happy with my position that I do not wish to take out membership and actually we have great discussions on matters that he’d be reluctant to have with congregants. I now am quite happy to visit and worship in various churches of different denominations and some independent groups - and made some good friends along the way. Even more recently, I was finally able to visit a couple different SDA churches – and feel comfortable. I felt it necessary to be able to walk back in to a denominational church where I had so many mixed feelings and history. I needed to do this as a therapeutic measure so as to close that chapter and put that finally behind me. I noticed there definitely appears to have been some changes over the years – and I met up with some dear old friends I had not seen for many years. They asked if I was back (in town) and I assured them I was just visiting. I read a few articles and stories of Desmond Ford and his emphasis on grace and mercy (as I read it). This appealed because it was the legalism, and performance based religion I’d known growing up - which had convinced me I was hopeless and I could not ultimately succeed. Even were I to give it my very best shot, I’d never be able to stand the anxiety whilst awaiting the verdict (saved or condemned). I don’t think my story is unique and I know a number of people my age, who I attended school with, some of whom even became pastors - who also left. Some are still Christian and some either atheist or simply don’t care. My Pentecostal pastor friend assures me that I was not alone and other denominations (his included) were much the same – other than attending Sunday School rather than Sabbath School. Anyway just wanted to tell you a bit about myself and say Hello. If this is the right place, I'll share more of my story - if this is not the right place, maybe someone can direct me to where I should post. Many thanks. |
