| Author | Message | ||
| Pnoga Registered user Username: Pnoga Post Number: 206 Registered: 1-2007  |
Well I have been in my own personal wilderness lately. The Lord has taken me away from everyone and everything over the past year and has been revealing alot of things to me about myself. I realized that I was obtaining much knowledge to God's truth. God has showed me that the SDA teachings are not biblical. But with all the wisdom God was showing me, I still was not trusting Him and applying His love for me with others. I realized that my marriage was falling apart right under my nose and I was oblivious, to caught up in debating SDA doctrine. God's purpose for calling me was to show His love for me and to show me how to love others. I feel like I became no better than the criticising SDAs only I was criticising them, I was trying to do it with love but I guess they didn't see it that way. I guess I got in God's way and did it my way rather than His. I really had to humble myself before God these past few months, and I am so glad I did. He has awakened a love in my heart like a love I have never been able to give. First and foremost I need to let God work in me to restore my marriage and my home. If I can't be a leader in my home than what can I be to anyone else. With God working in me, he has restored my love for my wife. He has made me realize that I have trampled my marriage and was very selfish, I let my own feelings determine how I should treat my marriage. What a mistake. My wife is such a awsome person, and I have never showed her how much I appreciated her, I didn't love her the way a husband should, the way God intended. I pushed my wife away, and God has opened my eyes to that. I know I can't restore my marriage but I know the Lord can. I am allowing God to love my wife through me, through my close walk and obediance to Him. I am praying and hoping she will see it and accept it. So that is where I am at now. As for the SDA thing, I know the truth but I cannot allow my own Peter in me get in God's way. I have to be patient and wait for the Lord, if He knows someone is ready He will send them my way. I know God's will and that is Jesus fulfilled God's will and God's will for me is to put my faith and trust in Jesus. I know and understand that my family and friends in the SDA church truly have a zeal for the Lord but not according to God's righteousness. I know there is so much confusion in the SDA church and so many divisions happening lately that it seems no one there really knows what the church believes anymore. With that last few times I visited the church I attended, I couldn't help but feel the confusion, division, hurt and fear. Oh and even the spirit of the accuser from some of the hard-core Ellen followers. I realize that some of my friends and family are coming on this forum to see what I am saying and showing it to others so they can talk about it, a feel I am lost or whatever it is they feel. Makes no difference to me anymore I know the Lord accepts me. I know I am tired of the arguing, well actually truth be told it's them telling me I am wrong and ignorant but does not matter anymore. I know they will not truly hear me out and sit down with me with an open heart. I know they will not study with me. I know truth be told that if they really cared about what was going on in my life they would ask me why I believe what I believe and allow me to share it. Not cut me off and "Lord forgive me" come to me with a spirit of anger. I am just going to focus on the Lord for now on and allow His love to work in me. I pray that the Lord will give them the peace that He has given me. If any of my family or friends are seeing this, know that I love you, period. Peace in Christ, Paul | ||
| Philharris Registered user Username: Philharris Post Number: 1350 Registered: 5-2007  |
Paul, Thank you for sharing. You words are an answer to what is going on in my own life. Phil | ||
| Bskillet Registered user Username: Bskillet Post Number: 148 Registered: 8-2008 |
With God working in me, he has restored my love for my wife. He has made me realize that I have trampled my marriage and was very selfish, I let my own feelings determine how I should treat my marriage. Praise God! It is amazing how living to the Spirit, rather than living to the Law, achieves what the Law never could. Sanctification comes by grace, not by human effort. After we left SDAism, my wife and I got in an argument. We don't have really bad arguments, but we have arguments. It was then that all of a sudden, by grace the Spirit told me, "Bskillet, you're a lousy husband. Just cause you don't cheat doesn't mean you're a good husband. You never make time for your wife, you're always impatient and overly critical." Being able to admit I was a lousy husband has really revitalized our marriage, because it has allowed the Spirit to work in me to make me a more loving husband. It was so liberating to admit that. Law-based living cannot bring that about, because those under the Law cannot admit they are not fulfilling its demands. After all, if they admit they can't do it, they die. Praise God that we have died in Christ. | ||
| Christo Registered user Username: Christo Post Number: 90 Registered: 2-2008 |
Thankyou Paul, Chris | ||
| Colleentinker Registered user Username: Colleentinker Post Number: 9338 Registered: 12-2003  |
Paul, thank you. What a convicting post. Praying for you and your wife, Colleen | ||
| 8thday Registered user Username: 8thday Post Number: 647 Registered: 11-2007  |
I agree that letting the Holy Spirit have reign is much more refining that a list of rules. I can understand sometimes, why people don't want to give up the list. It doesn't ask for much really. Jesus says every inch of you needs to die, so He can live in you. That's so much harder I've been learning. =) Thanks Paul - and your telling it will also bring additional freedom, if it works for you like it does me. Praying for you and your family - aaalll of them. =) Sondra | ||
| Pnoga Registered user Username: Pnoga Post Number: 207 Registered: 1-2007 |
Thank you guys so much for the prayers. I feel blessed to have found this forum. God Bless, Paul | ||
| ~angel~ Registered user Username: ~angel~ Post Number: 429 Registered: 3-2008  |
Paul thank you for being so honest and sharing your story with us. Many of us can relate to you. My God give you the courage and strength you need my friend. I'm Praying for your whole family too... ~Angel~ |
