| Author | Message | ||
| Lifeanew Registered user Username: Lifeanew Post Number: 119 Registered: 10-2007 |
Toria, We will remember you in our prayers too. Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will take care of itself, each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:34 Hang in there, Jan n Bob | ||
| Colleentinker Registered user Username: Colleentinker Post Number: 8365 Registered: 12-2003  |
Praying, Toria. You are loved. Colleen | ||
| Blessed Registered user Username: Blessed Post Number: 198 Registered: 1-2007 |
Toria, Am continuing to pray for you. Shirley | ||
| ~angel~ Registered user Username: ~angel~ Post Number: 190 Registered: 3-2008 |
Spokenfor, I'm prayng also. Toria, my mother-in-law is going through the same thing. I'm praying for you too. ~Angel~ | ||
| River Registered user Username: River Post Number: 3026 Registered: 9-2006  |
Toria, Praying for you, praying that God will send the help you need. Spokenfor, Praying for that family and for you. River | ||
| Mommamayi Registered user Username: Mommamayi Post Number: 507 Registered: 12-2007  |
Always praying for you, Diana C. | ||
| Spokenfor Registered user Username: Spokenfor Post Number: 101 Registered: 12-2003 |
Continuing to pray for you Toria. Thank you all again, so much, for your prayers for my friend who lost her son last week. I attended the memorial service for him yesterday and came away feeling so much better than I did going in. So many there spoke about how her son had touched their lives for Jesus, how he loved to talk about Him, and share his love for Him. It was so reassuring to be with others who believed that my friend's son was at home with Jesus. My friend and her husband have been very comforted and strengthened by the Lord during this time - seeing them was a testament to His faithfulness in times of sorrow. I know that your prayers have played a part in this. Thank you so very much. In His love, Spokenfor | ||
| Jim02 Registered user Username: Jim02 Post Number: 562 Registered: 5-2007 |
I have a younger sister who is 47, married, and a couple kids. They are looking for work and a place to live. Transient. Staying with her oldest son, but they have to get a place of their own. She is what I call last day primitive SDA. Literal, Wilderness family. They have attempted to settle in the back woods several times and have lived in squalor for two decades. Including a school bus on a creek in KY, In a shack in OK somewhere, in church housing, IL, KY, TN, GA, FL etc... A lifestyle she can no longer do. She went to school recently and just completed training as a philbotmist sp (takes blood) and she has a certifaction now. But they are putting out feelers, unemployed etc... They called my sister upstate and are looking in her area, and I am supposed to call her (my younger sister) tonight, she wants to talk......... Here comes another guilt trip. I am not in a position to say , ya'll come. In fact, such a drop in would be more that I could handle. I ask for prayer, for guidance and tact. I ask for prayer that they will find work and a suitable place to live. Everybody I know has problems. Things are tough all over. I need His wisdom on this. jim02 | ||
| Toria Registered user Username: Toria Post Number: 395 Registered: 2-2006  |
Jim, I am praying....... God Bless, Toria | ||
| Flyinglady Registered user Username: Flyinglady Post Number: 5522 Registered: 3-2004  |
Jim, You are not your sister's rescuer, God is. I will pray for her that she find a place to settle. I continue to pray for you. Diana | ||
| Colleentinker Registered user Username: Colleentinker Post Number: 8391 Registered: 12-2003 |
Jim, I echo Diana. I am praying. Colleen | ||
| Mommamayi Registered user Username: Mommamayi Post Number: 519 Registered: 12-2007 |
And I triple it Jim. This pattern has been going on for 20 years. Some people have a flawed way of looking at life - that the world owes them something. Perhaps by drawing a boundary, you can help promote change. At least you won't be enabling. Praying also, Diana C. | ||
| Jim02 Registered user Username: Jim02 Post Number: 564 Registered: 5-2007 |
Thanks, everyone. I am glad there is a consensus. I want to do what is proper and reasonable. I spoke with her last night. Basically, left it in neutral and in her court. I expressed my concerne, asked a few questions and encouraged her to work from her base there. I will pray for her, that God will help them find their stability and meet their needs. They have skills, they can do this. | ||
| Dd Registered user Username: Dd Post Number: 814 Registered: 7-2004  |
Jim, As I have read through your posts my heart has oozed emotionally for you. I have lived your life of trying to control my environment, trying to change the habits and behaviors of those in my world, I have begged and pleaded God for His help and peace...all to no avail. After a lifetime of trying, my life was a shell. I KNOW your angst and torment. I KNOW the sick, gut-wrenching grind in the pit of your stomach. I am sorry for all you are going through. I am feeling impressed this morning to share a very small portion of my journey with you...so...here is my thimble-full of wisdom I have gleaned through my own wonderings: I can only take care of ME. It is only about ME. I know this sounds very new age, selfish, sinful...contrary to what we have been told by Christians that God expects us to be. We have been told God wants us to "turn the other cheek", "go the extra mile", "give the shirt off your back", "be the better person".... But, think about it. When we empty the watering can to give our plants what they need to sustain life, can we keep our plants alive if we never fill the can up again? It is the same for us. When we allow someone to suck us dry of who God intended us to be, how can we possibly be of any value to anyone? For years I prayed, begging God to make things right in my life. I knew exactly what needed to be done - why didn't He get going and fix it? All the while I was pleading I was focusing on who or what needed to change instead of listening to that still small voice within myself. I did not take time to know me, to understand me, to see my own life as valueable. As an Adventist I did not understand God's spirit was within me the moment I accepted Jesus. I now blame this on the doctrine of soul sleep. How could my spirit be in communion with God's spirit within me since I my spirit was just going to stop exsisting when I died? When I came to understand His promises of "I will NEVER forsake you....I will NEVER leave you...you shall have ETERNAL life..." were literally true, it began to dawn on me that I could faithfully trust that voice within me. When we push that voice out that says, "Enough! I don't deserve this! She/he is hurting me! This upsets me...", I feel we are trampling out the very voice of God in our lives. I have come to believe it is a dark spirit that wants us in the bondage of a relationship that controls our emotions, our time, our thoughts and leads us to tell ourselves we need to keep trying. Jesus was the master boundary setter. Look at His life and see how He took care of Himself. He took time out of His busy day to get away, He set boundaries, He did not allow people to walk all over Him. He knew and understood the Spirit of His Father was His guiding force within Himself. Can we call Him selfish for all that? NO! We look to His selfless act of dying on the cross for us and somehow feel we can do the same for others. It is all a mixed up mess when we feel we can do anything for anyone else. That is not our "job". Jim, I can only share my own experience as I cannot help you. Only you can help yourself when you are ready as you have walk your own journey. A popular saying in a recovery group I belong to is: "If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans!" I have several books to suggest to you: "Boundaries" by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend "Co-Dependent No More" by Melody Beattie "The Language of Letting Go" by Melody Beattie Sorry for the long rant - As I said, I was impressed this morning to share a little of my experience. My experience tells me as I care for and change myself, I make the most impact in the lives of others. For what it is worth - there is my thimble-full of knowledge. Blessings to you, Jim. Denise | ||
| Jim02 Registered user Username: Jim02 Post Number: 566 Registered: 5-2007 |
Thank you Denise. "I have come to believe it is a dark spirit that wants us in the bondage of a relationship that controls our emotions, our time, our thoughts and leads us to tell ourselves we need to keep trying." Pondering this one........ Thank you. jim02 | ||
| Colleentinker Registered user Username: Colleentinker Post Number: 8399 Registered: 12-2003 |
Jim, quite simply, you can't play God. You can't fix your wife or your marriage. You can only submit to the Lord Jesus and allow Him to discipline and heal you. Dd is right that we cannot follow Jesus' example of the cross. Jesus died once for all. He died for you, and He died for your wife. That's why you have to release her to Him and allow Him to walk with you through whatever happens. He will clarify His own will to you, but you must answer to Him, not to anyone else or even to your mother's or father's or childhood priest's voice in your head. Your "job", Jim, is to ask Jesus to reveal truth and reality to you and to help you to know how to answer only to Him. Colleen | ||
| Jim02 Registered user Username: Jim02 Post Number: 567 Registered: 5-2007 |
Colleen, Denise, C: "Jim, quite simply, you can't play God. You can't fix your wife or your marriage. You can only submit to the Lord Jesus and allow Him to discipline and heal you." J: I have asked myself if that is what I am doing, in so many words. You spoke of the voices of my parents or a priest as perhaps what I am responding to. I am and have been responding to a lifetime of anchor points of faith. Certain things that are non negotiable. For me, it is precisely the fact that I am not playing God ,that I have held on. Not just legally, but because I am standing in the gap for both of us. If need be, I am expendable. Perhaps that can be relabled, yet between God and I it is genuine. The non negotiable voice is that some things carry a truth that cannot be canceled by my own act or choice. This is neither denial nor obsession. It is an anchor of knowing right from wrong. Some things are bedrock. This choice is not mine to make.If I have a choice, it is obvious I choose us. beyond that, I will not sabotage to escape, and I am placing this in His hands. I take the abuse because Love is greater than all this. I am covering her with my own intercession. Cor 13.Love It keeps no record of wrongs, it perserveres , it does not fail. I am holding everything I learn in tension. The big picture, the contengencys. I am standing with whatever strength is left. jim02 | ||
| Colleentinker Registered user Username: Colleentinker Post Number: 8402 Registered: 12-2003 |
I understand, Jim. God will continue to guide you. Colleen | ||
| Kathy23 Registered user Username: Kathy23 Post Number: 49 Registered: 6-2005  |
I am requesting prayers for my family in Arizona and myself. My grandmother passed away a few days ago. I am flying to Arizona today for the funeral (funeral on Tuesday). She lived a good life. She was still living in her own home up until the end. She was visiting my Mom in Tucson for a week (grandma lived in Yuma)and had a heart attack as she was waking up one morning. When my Mom found her she wasn't breathing. It was quick and merciful. Her funeral will be in an Adventist church. I haven't stepped foot in an Adventist church in many years. I am a little nervous about it. My Mom, sister and I will be singing "Untitled Hymn (Come to Jesus)" at the service. Thank you Diana (the younger) for introducing me to that song on a thread months ago. I hate flying but know I must do this. I would certainly appreciate your prayers as I face this fear head on today. Thanks! Kathy | ||
| Flyinglady Registered user Username: Flyinglady Post Number: 5528 Registered: 3-2004 |
Praying for you and your family. Diana L |
