| Author |
Message |
Bob
Registered user
Username: Bob
Post Number: 247
Registered: 7-2000
| | Posted on Saturday, May 14, 2005 - 10:34 am: |     |
The following is cleverly written. I thought you would enjoy it!
This must have been written by an engineer. It is logical, straight to the point with clarity, and all of the problem indicators are spelled out, with clear specifications for correction. No over-used Christian code words -just the facts!
Bob
RECALL NOTICE
The Maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart.This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units, code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units. This defect has been technically termed, "Subsequential Internal Non-morality," or more commonly known as S. I. N., as it is primarily expressed.
Some other symptoms:
1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish, or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion in the mental component
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion
The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory authorized repair and service free of charge to correct this SIN defect.
The Repair Technician, Jesus, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required.
The number to call for repair in all areas is: P-R-A-Y-E-R. Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure.
Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician, Jesus, into the heart component.
No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, Jesus will replace it with:
1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self control
Please see the operating manual, the B. I. B. L. E.
(Believers Instructions Before Leaving Earth), for further details on the use of these fixes.
WARNING: Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded. For free emergency service, call on JESUS.
DANGER: The human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace. The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent contamination of that facility.
Thank you for your immediate attention.
GOD
Please assist where possible by notifying others of this important recall notice!!!
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Belvalew
Registered user
Username: Belvalew
Post Number: 431
Registered: 7-2004
| | Posted on Saturday, May 14, 2005 - 1:51 pm: | |
Thank you, Bob. This is fabulous, direct, and to the point. Can't wait to share it with my friends!
Belva |
Dennis
Registered user
Username: Dennis
Post Number: 385
Registered: 4-2000
| | Posted on Saturday, May 14, 2005 - 2:02 pm: | |
Bob, thanks for sharing this excellent story. I have already shared it with some friends.
Dennis J. Fischer |
Colleentinker
Registered user
Username: Colleentinker
Post Number: 1959
Registered: 12-2003
| | Posted on Saturday, May 14, 2005 - 9:57 pm: | |
Bob, that is excellent! Thank you for sharing it!
Colleen |
Flyinglady
Registered user
Username: Flyinglady
Post Number: 1494
Registered: 3-2004
| | Posted on Sunday, May 15, 2005 - 7:42 am: | |
Bob, That is good. I am going to share it with every one I know.
Diana |
Riverfonz
Registered user
Username: Riverfonz
Post Number: 300
Registered: 3-2005
| | Posted on Sunday, May 15, 2005 - 7:14 pm: | |
Bob, Thanks for sharing this. Stan |
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